Category: Uncategorized
It’s all a matter of connection
Have you ever considered how what we do depends on others?
What we think, what we perceive, what we believe, all arises from a net containing the lives of all beings.
This is not something mystical, far away, detached from ordinary experience. This is ordinary experience. It is something very practical.
If you follow this blog you may know that I love meditation.
Having grown-up in Venice, Italy, I should consider meditation to be something proper of Christian monks, a practice to be performed in a Church. Instead, my idea of meditation is associated with somebody sitting crossed legs, focusing on his or her breath. And I love it!
My becoming in contact by this idea was made possible by a big, big, chain of people who were all connected to one another. This, somehow, brought this idea to me. Current technologies clearly make it easier for these ideas to flow. Yet, I cannot think but how magical all of this is.
Actually it goes deeper than that.
Not only is this connection of people nurturing us in our interests. This connection brings meaning and sustainance. Our lives litterally depend on the ones of others.
I find this to be one of world most beautiful magics, a source of inspiration and responsibility.
Taking the leap, a new writing experiment
Ok, it’s official. I am finally doing it.
It might be a bit early to share the news with you, yet I wanted to make my commitment more explicit and binding. I have finally decided to write a book!
I had an idea for a fiction story that stayed with me for quite a while. It stayed in my brain so long that it convinced me that it might be something worth writing about.
As with many things in life, I do not have too many expectations about it. I do not pretend it to lead somewhere, like money, fame or a champagne jacuzzi (although I’ll surely let you know if I end up in one!). But let me tell you one thing: the process has been great fun so far, and that’s all that matters!
As often happens with these types of projects I am completely pervaded by an enthusiasm that I can barely contain and I feel I need to write about it. Unfortunately I cannot write about the story itself (no spoilers!). What I wanted to share with you today are the sensations that starting a new writing challenge like writing a book can give.
It is so different
I did not expect how different writing a fiction can feel compared to other types of writing. In the past I have written poems, short stories, free thoughts and mindfulness posts. Writing all of this was really great fun. Writing a fiction feels so different. It is a two speed process. Sometimes words come quickly one after the other. Other times they come slowly and each of them requires pondering. Also the writing has to be carefully crafted into a beautiful and coherent whole which slowly brings the reader more and more into the centre of the action without spoiling surprises too early. It is like a door into somebody else’s fantastic world. A bit of time is needed for other to learn your language. Fantastic!
It is so hard
Writing for fiction is so hard. The difficulties are many. A text will need to be redrafted an incredible amount of times. All the characters need a level of depth I was not used to while writing short stories. The amount of description is also fundamental if one wants the reader to sink into the story (not literally of course!). More than else the challenge for me now is to provide the right psychological motivation to the characters. “Why would the characters acting the way they act? Why aren’t they reacting differently in the surreal situation they are living?”. These are the questions daunting me right now. Answering those questions is like undoing other people’s mental knots when I am not sure I can undo all mines. An exciting mental somersault.
It is so freeing
Writing a fiction gives such a strong sense of freedom. There is a whole world to develop, with its own funny, weird and colourful characters. Human emotions can be presented, twisted and taken to the extreme to see what would happen in an alternative universe with its own rules. It feels like being an alchemist in front of an unknown potion (will it work?). Also, the character development is much more fun then expected. Characters start with a mock voice given by the author. They then make a revolution, take their space and ending twisting the original plot of the story to their own will. Similarly to life things start in a way, then take a massive tangent to then appear again at the starting point with a completely different flavour. So alive!
This whole experiment (that’s what it is) is likely to take time. I do not mind if it will take the next five years of my extra time. I am more determined than ever to take it to completion. If only to see where it will lead me.
Some stories are worth writing about. I believe this story is one of them (at least for me).
I would be delighted to hear form you if you are also into a creative process like the one I describe above. If so let me know, I would love to hear about your creative work!
Best of luck to all of you out there who are committed to creative work! It is wort the pain!
Aroma, un tango
Era strano come la vista di lei richiamo’ alla sua mente l’aroma del caffé. Era un qualcosa a cui lui prima di allora non aveva mai pensato. Non l’aveva mai associato una donna ad un profumo amaro. Cosa ci poteva essere in lei che tanto gli richiamava l’aroma di una moka? La risposta arrivo’ come spesso fanno le intuizioni, con un lampo improvviso. Cio’ che in lei gli aveva fatto pensare a quella bevanda amara era la capacita’ del profumo del caffé di imporsi su tutti gli altri odori. Era questo cio’ che Luis aveva percepito quando aveva visto Carmen in quella sala da tango. Una presenza cosi’ intensa, come un profumo che si imponeva su tutti gli altri. Luis era un ballerino ormai esperto. Non un professionista, certo, ma sicuramente un praticante navigato abbastanza da saper trasmettere emozioni con la danza. Questa sua esperienza lo aveva gia’ fatto ballare con numerose altre donne. C’erano stati bei momenti, si, ma niente di paragonabile a quello che lui sicuramente avrebbe sentito con Carmen. Che cos’era in lei che lo aveva attirato a tal punto? Forse i suoi occhi neri con un brillio tra l’incuriosito ed il giocoso? Forse quei lunghi riccioli neri che lui voleva tanto accarezzare? O forse il suo portamento fiero che faceva scappare via ogni altro uomo non abbastanza sicuro di se stesso? Anche se la risposta a tutto questo gli sfuggiva, la mente di Luis era stata in grado di mandargli un messaggio ben preciso: doveva ballarci. La ronda di tango era iniziata gia’ da un po’. Il bandoneon quella sera gia’ sembrava parlagli. Ogni nota suonata dalla banda quella sera sembrava averlo portato a quell’incontro. La mente di Luis continuava a mandare segnali sempre piu’ chiari. Quale migliore modo di conoscere una donna se non ballandoci? Che importa poi se quello che uno scopriva sulla pista da ballo fosse realta’ o finzione? Ad ogni passo verso di lei la sua convinzione saliva. L’incontro si sarebbe svolto secondo regole ben precise. Uno sguardo iniziale, per testare il terreno. Un accenno di lui alla ronda, il cerchio in cui si muovevano gli altri ballerini. Una risposta di lei, un sorriso, o meglio ancora un leggero inclinarsi del capo. E poi tre danze. La prima. Semplice. D’esplorazione. Una sorta di preliminari in cui si cerca di capire quali molle facciano scattare l’altro. La seconda piu’ decisa, un modo per farsi capire meglio, per far capire al prossimo come potrebbe essere una vita insieme. La terza danza sarebbe stata l’apice. Quello sarebbe stato il momento per tirare fuori tutto quello che si aveva da offrire e per soddisfare ogni desiderio nascosto senza piu’ nessuna malizia. Quell’esperienza, quell’emozione, era cio’a cui Luis mirava. Il piano di lui era ormai stato stabilito. Gli occhi di lei gli fecero capire che anche lei aveva un piano, forse diverso dal suo. Forse piu’ intenso. Ora non restava che recarsi a ballare. La vita avrebbe fatto il resto.
Thoughts Out Of shape
Hello my lovely readers! There are some big news for all of you!
This blog, Pensieri Fuori Forma, has now an English version! It is called Thoughts Out Of Shape Yay!
The reason for this change is very simple. I have seen that lots of you were following this site from all around the world, USA, UK, South Africa… Why then bothering you remembering one complicated Italian name?
Also some short stories or poetries just come out naturally in Italian and when translated they loose much of their groove. Having two separate version will allow me to write in the language that feels more natural in the moment.
What will change in the version of this website? Well, not much.
The blog will still be written from a space out of shape. Creative emptiness that looks into life.
The topics of this blog will largely be the same: mindfulness and consciousness, life, and short stories.
I will keep on posting the English material on both sites. The Italian material will be posted in the Italian version only. You can follow both sites if you wish, of course!
So, I hope you will have fun following the English version. Of course you will be more than welcomed in the Italian version as well!
Acqua / Water
Acqua entra lenta
in una grotta.
Colmato per secoli
e’ il mio spirito di te.
//
Water enters slowly
in a cave.
Filled for centuries
is my spirit of you.
From here to the end of the year
“It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell.”
Buddha
Recently I have been struck by one thought. Living in a big city like London one is often tempted by too many distractions. There is noise while walking in the street, the daily trip to work means packed people in the tube and new stimuli always try to catch your attention. This is even more the case when one is looking for distraction to shake off the stress of the day. The search for comfort is too tempting and far too easy to achieve, therefor all of this distractions shift ones attention leading to ones own energies dispersed and fragmented. The same is true for finances. All of those resources (which are such because they are scarce!) could be used much more wisely if spent mindfully, rather than going after comfort food, weekend overspending or useless activities. Ultimately a little more mindfulness on this side could lead to much more security, more freedom and ultimately to more satisfaction. So here comes the idea: become much more mindful of the use of resources from here to the end of the year.
What this would mean in practice
The idea is to avoid all the necessary distractions and expenses until the 31st of December. For me this implies not eating out too often, not buy books I’ll read sporadically and try to select which activities to pursue over the week end. To be truthful for me this also means not to spent too much time browsing the internet or the social media (why are they called social if one ends up spending time alone, anyway?). Of course it is impossible not to buy anything from here to the end of the year, nor to avoid every kind of fun, so here’s my plan. From here to the end of the year I will: a) Eat out once a week (excluding special occasions like birthdays, in which I will also try to spend less), b) eat home cooked food at work, c) no coffees (bye latte), d), no comfort food while stressed after work , e) no personal expenses unless strictly necessary, f) no additional activities unless free, g) internet once a day (bye social media), h) no procrastination on activities/projects, f) exercise. This might seem strict and with no room for fun, but this is not the case. All this focus might lead to more fun, better fun, smarter fun. A form of fun which leads you with more space to create, much more appreciation of the moment and more freedom.
Accountability
Of course I cannot do all of this by myself. That’s why I decided to post this commitment in this space. Also I will make this clear to my family and friends so they, hopefully, can support me. So the challenge begins. Nothing special, just learning to say no. It is going to be fun! And if I think about it, this challenge for the vast majority of world is no challenge at all, which makes it even more hard to give up! Wish me good luck!
Fiori di pace
Fiori di pace dentro di me.
I loro semi eran caduti su terreni
aridi, sassosi e spioventi.
A vederli allora non gli avresti dato
la piu’ minima speranza.
Eppure loro, nella pura ingenuita’,
han saputo farsi strada dissetati da acqua divina
ed ora inconfondibile é il loro profumo.
Poesia
Poesia é un regalo che gettiamo lontano
e chi lo raccoglie lo fa in occasioni ignote.
Che importa allora il nome di chi scrive?
Questa notte due anime danzeranno su carta.
Foto: “The sleep of the beloved” di Paul Schneggenburger
Non-luogo
Energie incanalate a tener su costruzioni di sabbia, proprio li vicino a riva.
Un marchio, un nome, un logo oppur una categoria,
qualsiasi cosa pur di saper d’essere qualcuno in questo mondo,
poco importa se illusorio o doloroso,
perché Il concetto é per la mente una droga che scorre sotto pelle,
é un’acqua amara che la nostra struttura brama per sfuggir a questo ardente nulla.
Eppure, quanto spazio da quassu’.
Una pagina bianca che accetta ogni inchiostro e poi lo scuote via,
un se sempre nuovo, chiaro, eterno.
La vecchia paura sembra solo una tana in cui si é stati troppo a lungo,
e quel che sento é solo il pizzicore dell’adattarsi alla luce.
Dimenticati di me, non cercarmi in qualche luogo, nelle storie o in qualche libro,
io sono cotto, finito, andato eppur gioioso,
ho riposto la corona del mio io per quella trasparente del presente
e se anche tu la indosserai non ci saranno due, dieci, cento o mille, ma un solo re,
perché questa é verita’, come l’aria che respiro,
entra, da vita e con un grazie se ne va’.
Non c’é bisogno di bussole, mappe o souvenir, perché uscita lei riparte in nessun luogo
e passato il vento rimbomba sempre il silenzio.
Foto da: The Thoughtful Spot
Though Life
Non mi hai lanciato
in questa vita
perche’ il mio cuore
non fosse spezzato,
ne per assicurarmi
di non aver mai
un occhio nero
o qualche costola rotta.
Spesso anzi,
l’asfalto
crea piu’
d’una bruciatura.
Ma io
non posso odiarti
per avermi reso
una goccia nel tuo mare,
Giacche’
da quando e’ nato
il mio essere
e’ colmo di Te.
Pensieri Fuori Forma 